I'm scrabbling at the sand again.
I pray:Waves! be Kind!
Don't suck me down like a piece of spaghetti.
I pray for firm footing,
Hands free at last
Of this gritty softness.
I wish I could be a fish,
Silver, swooping with the shoal,
And not so bent on being upright.
Sloshing between here and there,
With here so hard to hold.
Always facing belonging
Without knowing what's needed.
But I am angry.
This flotsam life, grudging, makes me rage.
Those well-oiled door-keepers,
They hate the sand.
And I never give up
Jamming my crampons
Into that shifting here.
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